maybe it's because of the rain. the beautiful green grass that's gracefully eluding the fact that it is currently winter in VA. perhaps it's the balmy 57 degrees at 2 in the morning that is just making everything alright.
perhaps it's because i've had a few encounters with God this weekend that have truly been something remarkable.
perhaps it's due to an answer to a prayer of mine.. a specific, harrowing prayer in which i've pleaded with the Lord for an answer for days. is this where You want me, Lord? is this where i'm supposed to be? i'm not trying to question Your greatness or Your infiniteness. no, i have just been worrying lately. i've been struggling with trusting, dare i say it, You. the Lord of the universe. of course, now that i say it, it sounds rather ridiculous.. but true! God, please let me know. i need to hear from You.
well. i got an answer to that prayer today. multiple answers, to be exact. and i must say. i am feeling the love. i am finally feeling that which i have been longing and needing to feel for so long now. i feel like i belong again.
perhaps it's due to a few sweet emails i have received from some dear friends from both home and abroad that i have recently received.
perhaps it is as simple as watching a movie with a good, happy ending where all resolves and everyone makes it out alive (except, of course, the bad guy. which no one is really rooting for anyway.)
maybe it's a sweet conversation with my brother in which he actually admitting to missing me. (yes, that's right. my cool, smooth, 15-year-old jock brother just admitted to missing me. ha! who would have thought..)
perhaps it's just knowing that i have such a wonderful group of friends who is always there to have my back, joke around, and just have an overall good time.
it might have something to do with the best ex-RA in the world.
it might have something to do with hiding in bathrooms and pretending like we're undercover spies.
maybe it's the promise of a bright and meaningful future serving the most righteous and majestic of Kings.
maybe it's realizing for the first time in a while that life really is just beautiful. and that i am blessed beyond belief. knowing that these people are here to stay. in one way or another, i will always have them. even if they're not always by my side. i will always have them.
that is the beautiful thing.
it's something special when you realize just how meaningful human relationships are. when you see just how much worth every single person really has. when you can look at someone through the eyes of God.. when you can see people for who they are, how God sees them.. it really changes your outlook on life. everyone is just amazing. there is so much beauty out there. so much creativity. so many connections. we are all so intricately woven.. our lives are connected to each other in ways that are absolutely unimaginable. there is no way in denying the beauty of life, and the love that exudes from my beloved Savior through His creations.
i am blessed beyond belief.
i am happy to be alive.
i am excited for the sunrise.
all thanks to the redeeming love of my wonderful, beautiful Savior.
